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Epic Fail: The Journal of a Homeless Gamer
Book 15: Digital life, dreaming of a real one / Book 16: Different Paths

This is my journal I wrote during the time I was homeless. It is broken up by week for easier reading. Feel free to read it on the web or download the complete .pdf version and print it for reading offline.

View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 1 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 2 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 3 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 4 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 5 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 6 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 7 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 8 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 9 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 10 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 11 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 12 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 13 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 14 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 15 .pdf paperback book
These include the Table of Contents, Glossary and links, all weeks, all pictures, and index.

Week 783

Day 5475 - 6/28 - Too hungry, too full

Today was pretty good. We had my in person class final, so it was earlier than usual. That threw off my tummy since there was no break. Even though I had lunch early before class, by the time it was nearly up I was starving. I spent too much getting a meal in the cafeteria. It will be the last one until I return in late September. It was not only too much food, but having dinner 2 hours later I hadn't recovered and so I felt sort of overly full.

It was a pretty good day though. I mostly got to play my normal amounts, and I watched a couple of shows, so things were pretty relaxed. It's odd to be at the end of another quarter and still feel no closer to a job or solid path in life. But I guess I can only continue on one step at a time.

Day 5476 - 6/29 - Swollen

Today I am dealing with a bit of a swollen tongue. It's like when it's just a bit, but the sides got pokie because of the teeth, then it's all overly sensitive when eating or swallowing. It's not too bad, but eating is not the best or easiest. I noticed too I've been absent-mindedly scratching at my right arm; specifically the back of the hand along the top to almost my elbow. Last night those areas were a bit swollen too. So I wonder if something affected that area, then got into my bloodstream, and that is why my tongue is swollen.

I guess it was a pretty good day though. It was strange to be the last real day on campus. I mean, sure, I'll be here to shower twice a week and have a quick micro lunch very early on those days too during July, but that's all I'll do. (August will hopefully also still be a twice weekly morning shower, but the cafeteria will likely be closed.) My big time and routine of being there for class or hanging out around class times is done until I maybe go back in late September.

But my life is what it is, one day at a time, and so I try to continue on.

Day 5477 - 6/30 - Tired day

Today I am pretty tired. I think I kept waking up last night or something. I remember being not fully asleep all the time.

I guess today was pretty ok. I had fun playing, and spent time catching a streamed show. There were some late teens kids across from me sniffling and coughing that had me worried, so hopefully I am ok.

I guess today wasn't terrible for an official summer start.

Year 16

Day 5478 - 7/1 - Stupid hot

Today is stupid hot. It's been around 75F or less lately, but all of a sudden it's spiked up to the mid 90s and it's almost early evening now.

I guess today was ok. There were some people at my table, but they weren't too bad. The connection was kind of garbage though. I decided not to spend the time in my MMO like I'd planned because I didn't want to drop during a group activity. I played my new actiony game, which was pretty fun, but even that got dropped as many as four times an hour. It cleared a bit in the afternoon but still had issues.

I guess it was a pretty good day, but now in the heat I'm sweating, and it will probably be a few hours until it actually cools off.

Day 5479 - 7/2 - Still hot

Today is still pretty hot. I guess it will stay pretty warm until Wednesday when it will cool back down to the mid to high 70s.

I had some different lunchmeat for lunch, I think sobresso, which was pretty tasty but quite a bit greasier than the regular salami I think. So, my tummy feels a bit off. Not sick, not upset, just not fully settled I guess.

It was a pretty good day for resting and playing. There was a girl at my table and she would eat one chip every 5 minutes. I was right on the verge of losing it after a few hours, but then I left. It's like I get you want to keep quiet to not be rude, but it is actually more rude constantly eating for hours than to be louder and eat enough to get full all at once. But the connection was stable, so playing my games was good and uninterrupted.

Day 5480 - 7/3 - DMV

Today I have an appointment at the DMV. It's set for an hour before the library opens, which I picked that time because I wasn't sure if they would be, so hopefully it will be like 15 minutes and done, and then I can be there and ready before it opens. But I don't know. I still have no real idea why I have to go in person instead of just doing it online like I have been. I'm going to guess they want a new picture and maybe fingerprints or something. I guess I'll see and keep my fingers crossed it's quick and easy.

Hopefully today will go easy, quickly, and I can settle in for what will be a first Monday of the summer.

Day 5481 - 7/4 - Outside pew pew day

Today is pew pew day, which means all the places I could be will be closed. All I can really hope for is it's not too hot outside of the library so I can be in the outside spot, and that power and the connection are ok. Thankfully it is just the one day, with Monday and Wednesday as normal. So as long as nothing tragic happens I should easily recover mentally and physically tomorrow and be back to homeless summer normal.

Week 784

Day 5482 - 7/5 - Too quiet

Today the library seemed too quiet. There were a normal amount of people, but for some reason it seemed like no one was making sound at all and it felt wrong.

My back has been killing me lately. It may be because I was sitting outside yesterday, which at this point I'm not used to anymore, or it may be due to extreme stress from having to worry about the DMV not giving me my license and needing to do the doctor's note and go back again. I really do just hope I have to drop it off and that's it. Though I think even just dropping it off will probably be 2 hours again. The idiocy of how they run things is mind boggling.

Well, all I can do is try my best to rest, relax, and recover, and move forward one day at a time and hope the next is better.

Day 5483 - 7/6 - Still warm

Today it was still pretty warm. In the library it was actually cold enough to have my hoodie on part of the day, but outside I had to take it off along with my long sleeve shirt.

I took the DMV thing to the eye doctor today and he filled it out pretty quickly. Apparently in CA you can drive with only one eye, so he didn't understand why they failed me. But hopefully I just have to take it back. There seem to be only 3 days for appointments during the month, or they are all filled, because only 3 days in August showed as available. I don't know if it would be worth it though, as last time I think the non-appointment line people were being seen faster. I'll probably do that in the middle of next week and I guess just have to hope for the best.

Day 5484 - 7/7 - Swollen and sneezing, again

Today I am a bit swollen on my right hand and a bit on my arm. Mostly it's most visible on my right index finger and thumb, and again my tongue is kind of swollen. I actually wonder if I might be allergic to something I'm eating, as I'm super sneezy too. Swelling just on one side and sneezing isn't something I've had as a reaction before, but since it happened a few days ago I can't help but wonder if it is something crazy like that. Being some kind of bite, with symptoms going away and then coming back, seems unlikely. It's very strange.

I had a pretty good day other than that. I thought about getting a bit nicer food, but with a slightly swollen tongue again even basic food sounds mostly unappealing. I would like some chocolate maybe, but being warm to hot summer time that wouldn't keep at all, so I have to be very careful what I get. Though I do seem, Pepsi aside, to be totally back to previous normal in terms of reaction to cheese or chocolate. There have been no incidents of the mystery tummy pain since the food poisoning type incident. So I guess at least something seems to be back to normal.

Day 5485 - 7/8 - Still swollen

Today my tongue is still swollen. It doesn't bother me too much, but the pokie sides are pretty sensitive, so eating is tricky. My right hand and arm are still feeling a bit swollen too. I wonder what is up with that. I'm taking pills that I think are supposed to be anti-inflammatory, and an allergy pill, so I'm not sure why this is continuing to happen.

I guess the day was pretty good besides that. I had fun with my games, did a thing with my MMO guild, and was pretty restful. Really just the only sad part was my pokie tongue, which made me kind of swallow a lot because of that, and sniffling and sneezing. Things as always could have been better, but weren't the worst.

Day 5486 - 7/9 - Continue to be swollen

Today my right hand and arm continue to be a bit swollen. It's not a lot, just enough my fingers don't feel right in terms of width. You can see it in my fingers and forearm if you compare it to the left though. I still don't know what is going on with that. Since it's only that one side I'm guessing it must be some kind of bite I got, though there are very few marks. My tongue is still a touch swollen, though not as badly as yesterday.

Today was pretty fun. Things put me behind so I started a bit late, so I didn't do as much with my MMO. I'm having fun with my arcadey monster killing game now that I'm past the parts I'd seen before in the test weekends, and figured out some stuff that greatly increases my survivability. Though I would guess that I'd enjoy a just announced class (for a related game) more than the one I'm playing, but we don't know when that would come to the game.

So today was pretty good, though I'm still swollen for some unknown reason, and sniffling and sneezing.

Day 5487 - 7/10 - Hopefully not swollen

Today I'm not sure what to expect. I hope to pop by school to get a shower and then have an early micro lunch, as things should be fully open for the summer quarter. There was swim practice and things were open last Thursday, so I don't expect any weirdness.

Hopefully things will be less swollen and I can have a restful and relaxing day.

Day 5488 - 7/11 - Unknown Tuesday

Today I don't know what to expect. I'll hopefully have a restful and fun day and things will be pretty normal. Tomorrow I will put myself through the DMV hell. But hopefully today will be a calm, peaceful, and maybe finally I'll be over my sneezing, sniffling, and swelling.

Comments and stuff Copyright E. Stryker 2008-2023
Pictures for Epic Fail are taken by me. :)
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