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Epic Fail: The Journal of a Homeless Gamer
Book 16: Different Paths

This is my journal I wrote during the time I was homeless. It is broken up by week for easier reading. Feel free to read it on the web or download the complete .pdf version and print it for reading offline.

View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 1 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 2 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 3 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 4 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 5 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 6 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 7 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 8 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 9 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 10 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 11 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 12 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 13 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 14 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 15 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 16 .pdf paperback book
These include the Table of Contents, Glossary and links, all weeks, all pictures, and index.

Week 793

Day 5545 - 9/6 - A short wait

Today the weather is weird. It is still bouncing between looking and feeling like rain, and being hot. It can't make up its mind.

I am waiting a day or two for my test results. I don't know if the doc will call me to follow up or not. I think they are leaving that to whoever becomes my primary care person. I guess next week I'll see about calling to set that up. It probably won't be until mid October though, because the person said even after I do the emergency room visit to get the tests that would be a pretty long wait to see someone.

I guess now it's just a matter of various waiting for things to settle into place. Hopefully soon I can maybe get a real lead on what is going on and get meds to fix it.

Day 5546 - 9/7 - Sleepy

Today I'm pretty sleepy and hungry, though I did get extra sleep. I didn't quite get to play what I wanted as much as I wanted due to 'daily' type things in games, but that's ok. It will even out over time. And it is one of the very rare times I have so many fun things I'm actually feeling kind of happy overall.

Day 5547 - 9/8 - Rough sleep, good day

Today I am feeling pretty tired. For some reason I couldn't sleep until around 2. Things felt rough. I slept ok when I finally did get to sleep though. And today I've been able to play more of the things I wanted and spent less time on 'daily' things that felt required. My tummy is a bit off as I've had food I got yesterday, so that is not great, but overall things should be fine and maybe tomorrow will be an even better day.

Day 5548 - 9/9 - Water

Today I was pretty good and drank a lot of water and a minimal amount of soda. I lost some sleep though, so I'm very sleepy and extra hungry.

I guess overall it was a pretty good day. My dailies I feel like I need to do didn't take too much time away from my other games, so that seemed happy. My eyes were having one of the most blurry days ever though, so hopefully next week I can call the various people to get that appointment set up.

Day 5549 - 9/10 - Extra cloths, extra hungry

Today I wore extra cloths because I'm tired of freezing in the library. It's stupid how cold it is in there. Outside was moderate, not too hot, not too cold. I think, sadly, I may lose my nice warm weather soon. It always goes away too quickly.

I was also very hungry today for some reason. It may be because the chicken I got at the food store wasn't that great, so I didn't eat as much as I could have. I spent a bit of money getting more food. I'm ok on that for now, so I'd rather get my tummy more and better food if it's craving things, especially if those are things my eyes need to see. I'm still completely blind again today. Hopefully next week stuff can be set up to get helped soon.

Day 5550 - 9/11 - Unknown Monday

Today I don't know what to expect. The school hasn't yet closed, and with this and next week left that it would normally be closed it seems like it's not going to be. So I expect I'll get a shower and then have a normal day at the library.

Day 5551 - 9/12 - Unknown Tuesday

Today I don't know what to expect. Hopefully I can be calm and restful. Hopefully I can see better. Hopefully I can play and have some fun.

Week 794

Day 5552 - 9/13 - Appointment months from now

Today I burnt out all of my phone time talking to someone about getting my appointment set up. I guess the last person who told me to go to the emergency room for the first step, then I'd get priority, was wrong. This new person said the soonest I could be seen would be in December. (By someone with a name that sounds like 'butt shoe', which is hilarious.) Which is totally ridiculous, but apparently I have no choice. The nice hospital I was at for the emergency room visit could be my primary care people, but they have some rule that you can only change to them if you are a member, or someone in your immediate family is a member. If that were the case why would I be on the free coverage? I'd already have their coverage. It doesn't make sense. Well, I have no control and my only possibility to change it is to repeatedly call back and see if anything opened up. And since the call took more than 30 minutes, I really don't know if I'd subject myself to that even if I had unlimited time.

Surprisingly I checked the food store's pharmacy to see if they had my old prescription from like 5 years ago and they did. Not only did they have it, but I apparently correctly remembered 2 of the 3 names. So now I have my old medication and dosage noted as maybe a starting point for the new ones. It's sad I can't somehow just get my old medications and see if they work, or at least help.

I guess overall today was pretty good, but a bit disappointing in it's going to be 3 months before I even have a chance to see someone and get meds and investigate what might be going on.

Day 5553 - 9/14 - Heart feels bad

Today I had an ok time, but overall I feel kind of sad. Lately my heart has been feeling bad, likely due to the bad blood pressure. Though I have had less soda for about a week, sometimes half, and fewer doughnut in the morning, so that should be slightly better.

Mostly I am sad that there are going to take so long to see me. Maybe the new person I talked to didn't understand my issue, or is just a stickler for rules and my being a new patient and put me at the back of the queue. I wish I could have changed to the other hospital. They kept saying they were full, but everyone there seemed to actually care about getting me help as soon as they could. At least with all these calls I did find out that I can apparently go to any emergency room, so I'd be surprised if I got a bill that was more than something like $100 for the visit. There hasn't been any bill yet, and it's been more than a week, plenty of time for a bill to have already shown up.

I guess things are what they are, and as usual the majority of things are out of my control and I just have to try and let them go.

Day 5554 - 9/15 - Bad food, good food

Today was ok. I got some food from the food store that was kind of the worst. I really should never get their chicken strips. They are always bad. I've actually complained before, they got slightly better, but now they are always bad again. They have been ripping through me and upsetting my tummy today. I threw out what I otherwise would have had for dinner and instead got something else.

My heart felt a bit bad again today. That likely won't change until my blood pressure goes down or I get on meds. I wish it were sooner, but I guess that is my fault for not checking the costs when someone told me I wasn't covered for it. Hopefully it ends ok, and I can be much better soon.

Day 5555 - 9/16 - Extra wobbly

Today my right eye blind spot has been extra bad. It's still wobbly in that it sometimes is more or less bad, like my blurry vision can be more or less bad, so I wonder if maybe it's slowness to heal is related to the bad blood pressure. I'm sure the months will pass quickly enough, but maybe once every few weeks I'll check if there is a sooner appointment I can get.

Day 5556 - 9/17 - Casual

Today feels pretty casual is the only way I can think to describe it. I'm playing kind of whatever with no real organization or set times or tasks like I normally would. Nothing feels important to worry about. Things still don't feel great, and I do worry, but they aren't new issues and I can't really make them get better any faster.

Day 5557 - 9/18 - Last week

Today starts the last week of my full time at the library time. I will miss the quiet, at the school cafeteria can get quite loud, but the trade off of being able to micro or eat whatever food is good. They did change the rules (at the library) so you can 'have a snack', but it still feels weird to set up something like a sandwich and chips.

The one class I have for sure is online, and I have another I'm on the wait list for, so really I could just go to the library or wherever, but school is the best place to be. (And has their own library and other quiet areas if things get to be too much.)

Day 5558 - 9/19 - Hopefully calm Tuesday

Today will hopefully be calm. Hopefully the library won't be too cold, because it's still stupid cold in there lately. I guess if it's hot outside it could be nice, but I'd be surprised if it were over 65F. I'm wearing winter layers of clothing including my hoodie, which is just stupid I have to be fully dressed for winter inside when it's summer outside.

But hopefully the weather, and the library, will be reasonable temperatures.

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