PC talk system recommendations blog Facebook YouTube articles and guides links bio
rabb1t's ramblings podcast email
Epic Fail: The Journal of a Homeless Gamer
Book 16: Different Paths

This is my journal I wrote during the time I was homeless. It is broken up by week for easier reading. Feel free to read it on the web or download the complete .pdf version and print it for reading offline.

View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 1 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 2 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 3 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 4 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 5 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 6 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 7 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 8 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 9 .pdf paperback book, View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 10 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 11 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 12 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 13 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 14 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 15 .pdf paperback book
View/Download the Complete Epic Fail Book 16 .pdf paperback book
These include the Table of Contents, Glossary and links, all weeks, all pictures, and index.

Week 803

Day 5615 - 11/15 - Sneezing

Today I have been sneezing more and more. In the last hour I have been sneezing every few minutes and am actually getting that kind of sweaty hot feeling from sneezing so much. I must have a cold which has gotten worse over maybe the past week or so.

I guess other than that things were fine. I did a little on the art project I had to finish. Yesterday I thought it would only be 1-2 hours but it wound up being about 4-5. It took way longer than I thought it would.

My doc visit was good. I guess the 3rd medicine I used to be on was lowering something, but she said it was actually low now, so lowering more would be risky. So I guess everything looked good. And I got an inhaler, which I've pretty badly needed for a while, so that is good to have now.

One of my favorite games got a new dlc, so that has been super fun and happy. So I guess overall things feel a bit better lately.

Day 5616 - 11/16 - Dead contact

Today I think my right contact is dead. Which is super annoying because I think it's only 2 weeks old. Sure, it is a weekly type, so that is already more than it should have lived, but usually they last about 2 months before hitting this point. If I get 2 months out of each pair, that means I need 2 boxes for the whole year. If I only used them weekly as they should be, that is nearly 10 boxes for the year, a difference of needing to pay 320 more per year than I do. I guess it's not a huge deal for this one. I think I still have 2 boxes left. I got some extra when I had the surprise apocalypse money, so it should be fine. But it has been fuzzy vision in that eye, felt like something is stuck in there, and so overall put me into a bit of a grumpy mood.

I guess the day was pretty ok other than that. I wasn't too hungry, or cold, and while the kids around me were louder than I would have liked, the day was pretty ok overall.

Day 5617 - 11/17 - Upset system

Today my system is a bit upset. I don't know why, but it seems like there is a 70% chance if I get roast beef and a bit of cheese to make a sandwich it will upset my system. I don't know if that is because the food store doesn't cook it correctly or doesn't store it correctly, or what.

I guess the day was pretty good besides that. I was warm enough. The library was calm enough. And it's raining, which I like. So I continue to try my best to hang on.

Day 5618 - 11/18 - Upset, again

Today my tummy is upset by lunchmeat again. I got a different kind, but I really wonder if they are keeping it correctly. It's like every time I get deli meat it upsets my tummy to varying degrees.

I guess the day was mostly ok other than that. Though for the last few hours at the library there was someone with garbage ear buds that were leaking so much volume I could pretty much hear what they were watching, so that was annoying.

Overall I guess I feel ok. My lungs are pretty congested, and I've had to use my inhaler a few times to breathe better, but I guess things weren't too bad. I did feel pretty lonely and sad, but I guess that isn't really unusual. But I tried to continue on as best as I could.

Day 5619 - 11/19 - Half day

Today I really only got a half day at the library. The stupid connection was effectively flat dead until a bit past noon, leaving me only a few hours of use before needing to leave. I tried to do some stuff for my next art project next week, but I'm struggling with it. We need to get stuff from magazines, which I have limited access to, and it's very difficult to find stuff to use. On top of that I don't think the date was adjusted for turkey weekend (compared to other quarters), which really means I only have Tuesday and Wednesday before it really should be done.

Today was a big scramble due to the compressed day, so I am out of sorts, but I guess I try to continue on as best as I can.

Day 5620 - 11/20 - Probably rainy Monday

Today I expect the rain will come back. It's been off and on for the past week now. I will probably be a bit rushed to do my history class stuff. Usually I can do it all on Monday, so it should be fine. But with being forced to be outside Thursday and Friday I won't be able to do any real school stuff then, so this whole week may feel very rushed since it basically ends Wednesday evening.

Hopefully I can get through and things will be ok.

Day 5621 - 11/21 - Rush Tuesday

Today I will have to rush to try and do as much of my art project as I can. I only really have today and tomorrow to work on it, so hopefully it will go ok.

Hopefully I can get all the things I need to do done. And hopefully I can continue to hang on overall.

Week 804

Day 5622 - 11/22 - It's not the worst

Today I pretty much finished the most recent art thing I had to do. It's not the worst. I do need to get something printed out to glue on it on Saturday to fully finish, but that shouldn't take too long.

I am pretty worried and stressed out about the next few days. I will have to be outside which will be probably pretty cold. And it will be unpredictable, which always makes me stressed. And it looks like where I am trying to stay safeish at night may be changing some security stuff, so that will have me extra terrified until I see what happens with that.

So as usual so far Thanksgiving looks like it will be opposite for me as it is everyone else. I will be alone, out in the cold, with no comforts or happy times that are unusual. And this year more than ever before I may be fearful and uncertain about my future.

Day 5623 - 11/23 - Not the worst turkey time

Today was not the worst. It wasn't as cold feeling as it was. The connection was fine outside where I was. I stayed as long as I expected. And I got a bit of inside time at the ex-garage, so that was nice. I think maybe because I was outside though my allergies were triggered. Starting around noon I got sniffly and was sneezing several times every 15 minutes or so. Even now hours later into the evening I still am.

But today was not the worst. And I continue to try to hang on.

Day 5624 - 11/24 - Much too cold

Today was much too cold. I was shivering about half the time I was in my outside spot. Even now, hours after I've been in the car, it's not a lot warmer and my writing is very shaky.

I even messed up a game thing that I'd spent hours setting up. Because I was so cold and distracted I didn't see a guy around a corner and I died even though it was on the easiest setting while doing something I couldn't die during. So I have to now probably spend hours getting back to that point. I don't really mind though, as it's in one of my favorite games and it did teach me something about how to stay alive while doing things I can't die during.

I still have a few hours before it's time to be truly restful for my day, but so far I have made it through ok. The extra cold and stress has meant that for the past few days I can't see well. My blurry vision past 10' is back, but now with the closed days behind me hopefully that will clear up again. (At least until a month from now when there are two weekends of closed outside time.)

Day 5625 - 11/25 - Ok speed

Today passed at an ok speed. I brought in my art thing to finish and I actually forgot I needed to do it for the first 15 minutes after I had settled in. It was fine, as it only took about 30 minutes to finish.

I spent a few hours trying to do the special game goal that I blew yesterday and I did finish today, so that is good. Now I can move on to less taxing goals.

I was about average in the library; warm enough but still a bit chilly and needed to put on my hoodie by about 4.

I started the day with some pretty massive tooth pain though. It took me a while to put the numbing stuff I have on it. I think I am just so used to my teeth being the worst that I forget I can manage it. I took a few pain pills too, but it took several hours to calm down. Even now it is still there, though at a much more manageable level.

Oh, I almost forgot. At the start of my day when I was parked and waiting I saw a very cute striped kitty with no collar walk by. They seemed very clean and healthy. I tried to pet them but they were afraid. Not super afraid, but they always kept a few steps out of reach and only stopped if I was pretty far from them. So that was sad. It would have been nice to pet them.

I guess overall today had some good and some bad.

Day 5626 - 11/26 - Ok paced

Today was ok paced. It didn't go too slowly or too quickly. I had a mild headache all day though. But the tooth pain is mostly gone, so overall I feel better in general. Nothing special or noteworthy for today.

Day 5627 - 11/27 - Almost another ending

Today is the start of, I think, the last of 2 regular classs weeks. It's crazy that it is almost over since it feels like it barely just started. I have to see if there are some classes I can take next quarter. I don't know what I'll do when I'm out. I guess I just have to keep going and try not to worry about that until it comes.

Day 5628 - 11/28 - Hopefully warm Tuesday

Today hopefully will be warm when I'm at school. Lately it has been very cold, and on the weekends in the library I'm never warm enough. At least at school I'm usually warm. Though with the weather rapidly turning colder it may be tougher to stay warm.

Comments and stuff Copyright E. Stryker 2008-2024
Pictures for Epic Fail are taken by me. :)
best viewed at 1280 wide resolution or higher